Reindeer Bait
by Lawndale Stalker
Summary: Daria gives Quinn a "pre-Christmas" present.


Reindeer Bait  
A Daria Christmas story  
By Galen Hardesty  
  
Daria trudged homeward from Highland Elementary. It was quite warm for   
the last school day before Christmas, but at least it was cool enough to wear   
her jacket comfortably. And the dumb class Christmas party was history,   
until next year.  
  
Daria thought glumly of the present residing in her backpack. A plastic   
snowman pin to wear on her blouse. Riiight. She'd be sure to wear it the day   
of the next heavy snowfall in Hell. Daria liked the box it came in better. A   
small pasteboard box with fitted lid, it had a red-and-green holly design   
printed on it so it didn't require separate wrapping paper. It suited Daria's   
Christmas present philosophy. Least possible effort without actually insulting   
the recipient.  
  
As she semi-attentively scanned the way ahead, Daria's eye was caught by   
an object that truly epitomized Texas to her. She stopped and looked at it   
for a moment, and a small smile came to her lips.  
  
Later that afternoon, Quinn was carefully cutting out a party dress she'd just   
finished coloring, being very careful not to cut off the tabs. She turned at a   
soft knock at her door.  
  
Daria stood in the doorway. "Hey, Quinn, I got you a pre-Christmas   
present." she said as she held out a small box.  
  
Quinn's eyes lit up but she made no move to take the box. "You open it."   
She said suspiciously.  
  
Daria looked hurt, but lifted the holly-printed lid off the likewise-decorated   
box. A large brownish - green pellet was inside, nestled in cotton batting.  
  
"What is that?" Quinn wrinkled her darling little nose reflexively at the   
unfamiliar object.  
  
"It's a pellet of reindeer bait." Daria sniffed noisily. "Smell that? The   
fragrance of the meadows of northern Lapland, where the reindeer roam free   
till Santa's elves round them up for the Christmas run. It's compressed moss   
and wildflowers. The reindeer love it."  
  
Quinn took the bait. "What do you do with it?"  
  
"Set it out where the reindeer land. The idea is to make them stay in one   
spot longer so that Santa can unload more presents off the sleigh."  
  
"Oh, cool! You mean like in the yard? Out in the street?"  
  
"If you put it in the yard, something else might get it. I'd put it on the roof.   
That's where they landed last year. Just throw it up there so it lands on the   
flat bottom side and it'll stay."  
  
Daria went back to her room, and Quinn charged out right behind her. Daria   
heard the front door open and slam. Smirking, she shook her head. Not so   
much as a "thanks" had she gotten.  
  
Dragging her chair into her closet, Daria closed the closet door, braced the   
back of the chair against it, and began the tricky climb to the attic access   
hatch. She was pretty sure Mom and Dad had forgotten itn was here, if they'd  
ever noticed, and she wanted to keep it that way.   
  
A few minutes later, Daria, seated at the small attic dormer window,   
watched her sister's continued attempts to get the reindeer bait to stay on   
the roof. Yet again it rolled back down to the edge and dropped off. Daria   
stifled a giggle as Quinn's lips formed a word that Mom and Dad didn't know   
she knew.  
  
Quinn picked it up. It had broken in two, exposing its soft, chewy center,   
and Quinn was squeezing it together again. Drops of green liquid oozed   
between her fingers. Daria held her sides and tried to laugh quietly.   
Just then, a car pulled into the driveway and Helen got out. Quinn went over   
to her, apparently asking for help. Helen held Quinn's wrist and examined   
the reindeer bait. Daria bit the base of her thumb to keep from cracking up.  
  
"Quinn, that's a horse apple." Helen said.  
  
"A what?"  
  
"It's horse doodoo. Throw it down and wash your hands."  
  
Quinn gazed in horror at the brownish-green gak on her hands, then her face   
hardened into a mask of fury as she headed for the door. "Sure. Just as soon   
as I thank Daria!  
  
"Quinn, you wash your hands right now! At the outside faucet!"  
  
Daria rolled on the attic floor, convulsed by laughter, both hands clamped over   
her mouth, occasional tears running into her ears. Down below, she heard   
Quinn telling Helen about the "reindeer bait", and Helen calling her name.  
  
Daria knew better than to answer just yet. Helen would soon cool down.   
Then she'd tell Jake the story, and they'd have a laugh over it, somewhere   
away from Quinn. Only then would she come down. As she recovered from her   
fit of laughter, Daria reached over and pulled a book out of the box the last   
tenants had left up here. She'd read a chapter or two of... she looked at the   
cover.. "Girl of the Limberlost" by the last rays of the setting sun, and then   
sneak down, very quietly. Christmas couldn't be a total loss this year. A   
little piece of it had been merry already.  
  
La la LA la la.  
  
  
Merry Christmas from Lawndale Stalker. 


End file.
